forever?

is this really what i want to be my forever? this life this man this feeling? i've been thinkin about this a lot the last few days and i'm not sure i do anymore... my biggest problem is what should my first step be to fix this incessant feel of well nothingness i guess... there are options but all seem as daunting and terrifying as the next... Shit i'm useless at fixing my own issues - when its someone else problems the next step always seems pretty easy to see, Haha. guess i should first figure out what exactly it is i do want, then work on getting rid of what i don't...